Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Poems Found in Singapore Toilets

A budding poet trying his best...
Here I lie in stinky vapor,
Because some bastard stole the toilet paper,
Shall I lie, or shall I linger,
Or shall I be forced to use my finger.

Before he graduated to be a poet, he wrote this...
Here I sit
Broken hearted
Tried to shit
But only farted

Someone who had a different experience wrote:
You’re lucky
You had your chance
I tried to fart,
And shit my pants!

Perhaps it’s true that people find inspiration in toilets.
I came here
To shit and stink
But all I do
Is sit and think

There are also people who come in for a different purpose…
Some come her to sit and think,
Some come here to shit and stink,
But I come here to scratch my balls,
And read the bullshit on the walls.

Toilet walls also double as job advertisement space…
Written high upon the wall:
If you can piss above this line, the Singapore Fire Department wants you.

Ministry of Environment advertisement:
We aim to please!
You aim too! Please.

On the inside of a toilet door:
Patrons are requested to remain seated throughout the entire performance.

And finally, this should teach some a lesson…
Sign seen at a restaurant:
The hands that clean these toilets also make your food…please aim properly.

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