Jeezus Chryst!

I visited the Converse Warehouse Sale last week with a friend. Having parked the car, we were greeted by patrons who were already on their way out, with most carrying a bag or two. An encouraging sign, we thought, as the goods were probably worth buying after all. Alas, as fate would have it, the one pair of shoes that caught my eye didn't have my size. My friend shared the same fate. I guess it isn't time to hang up my current pair of Converse just yet. We were probably one of the rare few who left the building empty handed.

The Converse selection of shoes was neither great nor varied, hence to say I was slightly disappointed. Nonetheless, Humour never fails to find me.

So I was checking out the selection of Kappa shoes when a guy picked up a pair of plain all-black slip-on shoes, turned to his friend and asked, “Is it nice?”

Geezus. It’s plain. It’s black. It’s a slip-on. “Is it nice?” What do you think? It’s a freaking plain all-black canvas loafers, mate!

To which his friend responded, “Yeah...it’s really nice.”

JC. (Swt.)

Or some people might say ZOMGWTFBBQ. A phrase I’ve come across fairly frequently on the net but never understood what it meant. Of course it’s easy to see that it’s made up of ZOMG, WTF and BBQ, but reasons why those 3 are lumped together to form a word like such escape me.

Like what the hell is ZOMG in the first place? Who the hell types a ‘z’ before OMG? Wanting answers, I Googled and found them at Urban Dictionary which provided the following explanation:

The "z" was originally a mistake while attempting to hit the shift key with the left hand, and then typing "OMG".

Seriously?? Gawts!

And BBQ? Well, according to Urban Dictionary (I predict this will soon replace Oxford dictionaries in the near future. Heh.), when it’s linked at the end of WTF, it normally stands for Bitch Be Quiet.

So the whole phrase actually reads: Z-Oh-My-God-What-The-Fuck-Bitch-Be-Quiet!

JC.